Sometimes, things just don’t work out how you’d planned. And in some of these cases, that can mean the end of a relationship in which there are children involved. Most people don’t plan to go it alone with parenthood; but sometimes that’s just what happens. If you break up with your partner, know that all is not lost – many a single parent has bossed their role to raise a healthy, happy, confident, independent child who grows into a secure and successful adult! Being thrown into the world of single parenthood can be daunting and lonely at first, but it doesn’t stay that way forever. You can rise to the challenge of being your child’s sole parent and do it amazingly!
Here are some valuable pieces of advice from those who have been there, taken on the role of both parents, and made brilliant lives for themselves and their little ones.
Don’t feel guilty
Rule number 1: it takes two to tango, and two to maintain a healthy relationship. Don’t place the blame about your relationship failing purely on your shoulders or feel bad that you couldn’t hold it together for the sake of your child. In most cases, it’s better to break up than to raise your child in an unhealthy home environment.
When people who love you offer to help with childcare sometimes, take them up on it. They wouldn’t have offered if they didn’t mean it! You need some ‘me’ time as much as the next person, but sometimes that is hard to do with children around. One night a week where your friend or relative takes care of your child will give both you and your child some space, and they will probably love having dinner or a sleepover somewhere new! Similarly, if you know some other single parents, do a ‘swap’ and take care of each other’s children sometimes, to give you both a break!
Two or more kids? Double buggies are your best friend
Being a single parent to more than one child is a bigger challenge, especially where taking them out on errands is concerned. To streamline your outings, consider getting a double buggy that you can easily push on your own and keeps both your hands free. Check out doublebuggyreviews.com for a comprehensive guide of things to consider when choosing the right double buggy for you.
Put animosity aside
Unless there were circumstances of abuse in your relationship, maintaining a civil relationship with your ex-partner are paramount for ensuring a healthy, happy upbringing for your child. There are unfortunate instances where parents talk badly about the other in front of their child, or worse, try to actually turn the child against the other parent.
Assure your child that you both love him or her regardless of whether you are together or not and that you’re still friends. Don’t let your child see any fights or hear any bad words against the other parent.
Meet other parents
Parent-child meet ups, toddler groups and playgrounds are the perfect places to meet other parents in similar situations to you, to build a larger support network. What’s more is that your child will love meeting new friends too!
As we said, being a single parent can be lonely, so getting out there and meeting new people is great for you and your child.
A sudden break up is a distressing time for your child. Help them regain their smile, take their mind off things and facilitate positive chats about the situation by spending lots of one-on-one time with them doing fun things.
Make sure you set aside time every (or most) days to read together, cook, play games, learn, visit new places and just have a good time together. Answer any questions they have in a fair and open manner. They will feel loved, valued and heard; things that they might have trouble with during times of upheaval like parental splits.